When Moving In Together Is A No Good, Very Bad Idea

A serious relationship with the right person can change everything for the better. You love spending time with your significant other, and maybe you’ve been daydreaming about what it would be like to move in together. No more separate rent payments and no more leaving to go to your own house after a great night out. Plus, you could spend all the time you want with his/her awesome and adorable dog. But is moving in together truly the right decision for your relationship? Pay attention and watch for these 5 signs that could mean your daydream would lead to disaster.

Moving in together could be a bad idea when…

1. You haven’t met your partner’s friends or family.

Part of getting to know someone on a deeper level is meeting those closest to them. If you’ve had little to no interaction with your significant other’s friends and family, it may be a good idea to postpone moving in together. After all, these friends and family members will likely visit your new apartment from time to time. Make sure they’re people who can get along with, at least for a dinner party or other short amount of time. After all, they could be staying with you two—maybe over the holidays!

2. You’re not 100% sure where your relationship stands (or where it’s going).

The last thing you want is the headache of breaking up when both of your names are on the lease, so it’s a good idea to have that “DTR” conversation way before you consider moving in together. Don’t assume that you’re both in it for the long haul—it’s worth it to have a serious conversation with your partner about the state and future path of your relationship before you officially commit to renting your first apartment together.

3. Your biggest motivation for moving in together is the financial benefit.

Yes, it would be nice to only shell out one rent payment rather than two, but think long and hard before moving in together if financial savings is your main driver. You may think that you and your partner are both good with money, but even the smallest of financial problems can quickly derail an otherwise healthy relationship. Before moving in together, consider your financial health as individuals and the overall monetary logistics after a move.

4. You’re not confident in your ability as a couple to work through conflict or disagreements.

Every couple has disagreements, but it’s vital to handle them in healthy, respectful ways. If your arguments or discussions leave one or both of you feeling unsettled or unsafe, think twice before moving in together. Without healthy communication skills, living together can magnify tiny issues into massive ones. You don’t want the dirty dishes in the sink to turn into a screaming match over why you’re together in the first place.

5. You feel pressured or “guilt-tripped” into making the move.

The decision to move in together should be one that both of you are excited about. If your partner is pressuring you into finding a place together, take a step back. You need the time and space to make the decision on your own. If your partner truly cares about you, they will respect your wishes—even if it means waiting a while longer before moving in together.

After reading this, maybe you’re ready to start searching for your first apartment with your significant other. Or, maybe you’re considering breaking your lease and moving out of a not-so-good situation. Either way, ApartmentSearch is here to help. Find apartments for rent in your city and choose the perfect place for the next stage of your life—no matter who is part of it!